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Biden  Offers  Support  As  Fellow  Gaffer


Democratic leaders have highlighted their “war on women” theme. Perhaps this makes the Democrat’s gaffer-in-chief an even more unlikely – or likey – defender of Akin.


Jew-On-Jew Violence Stuns New York


Another hot summer in New York City has brought another record in Jew-on-Jew violence.  At least nine people were wounded in shootings over a hot, bloody weekend in the world’s largest Jewish population center.


Debate  To  Include  Physical  Challenges


Reports describing President Obama and challenger Mitt Romney’s first debate made it sound like a title boxing bout.  Portions of the third and final debate might not be far from the mark.


Romney  Promises Car  Pool  Lanes


Mitt Romney spoke before the U.S. Hispanic Chamber in Commerce and pledged to support giving Latinos special privileges to use the carpool lanes.


Arizona County Makes Its Special Connection To Mexico Official In July 4th Declaration


NOGALES, AZ – This Independence Day brings a different sort of independence for one Southern Arizona County reasserting its ties to Mexico, the native land of the vast majority of its residents.

Santa Cruz County, Arizona sits along the Mexican border with its largest city being border-crossing town Nogales. According to most recent census data, the county’s population is 93% Latino with most of its Latino ancestry tracing its roots to Mexico… [More]

Women In Science Month To End Having Accomplished Goals

Published July 1, 2012


BALTIMORE, MD – The National Council of Female Scientists announed that the much championed “Women in Science” Month shall be no more.  The reason: the Council achieved its goals of raising awareness of women in science.  As a secondary reason, the Council stated that it could not identify any more women in science to honor.

Only about 15 women have the Noble Prize in the sciences.  All had been honored, all tenured faculty at universities have been honored and no new candidates are waiting in the wings.  Gertrude Moore said that the Council preferred to retire WIS than honor the same women over and over again.  “We honored Marie Curie twice already, and that is enough.”

Kelly Files For Divorce Against Giffords


TUSCON, AZ – Another fairytale marriage apparently will end in divorce.  Astronaut Mark Kelly filed for divorce yesterday from U.S. Representative Gabrielle Giffords citing irreconcilable differences as the cause.

On January 8, 2011, Giffords and eighteen other people were shot during a public meeting held in a supermarket parking lot in Casa Adobes near Tuscon, Arizona. Six of those shot died, including a U.S. District judge.  Giffords took a bullet in her head at point blank range and has been staging a miraculous recovery ever since.  [More]

Girl Scouts To Open Barriers To “Franchise Sales”

SANTA MARINO – As if Girl Scout cookies do not taste delicious enough, half the enjoyment is helping a little

“Mustang” Sallygirl realize her dreams.  This is why some have raised an eyebrow at so-called Girl Scout cookie “franchise sales,” or when a third-party sells cookies on behalf of an active girl scout.  Oftentimes during a franchise sale rather than a spunky, freckle-faced pre-teen girl, cookie buyers find themselves buying from a middle-aged, Spanish-speaking man with a paunch belly.  Cookie sales are up, but affilate selling has some parents nonplussed….  [More]

 Condoms No Match For Determined Women Ready To Start Family

SANTA MARINO – When does a contraceptive (or “condom”) work as designed but fail to prevent pregnancy?  When the woman retrieves the condom after sex and reinserts it inside out, that’s when.  Once the bane of only professional athletes and millionaires, condom “stuffing” has become mainstream among women hoping to get pregnant by the man of their choice.

In a condom stuffing ploy, after coitus a woman secretly picks the soiled condom out of the bathroom waste bin and deploys it into her vagina.  If properly inserted pregnancy can result as easily as unprotected sex since sperm can survive for as long as 48 hours after ejaculation… [More]

 Romney Parries Left By Invoking Rev. Wright

LYNCHBURG, Va – Presidential candiate Mitt Romney proved that the primary has ended by citing President Obama’s controversial former pastor Rev. Jeremiah Wright.  While delivering a graduation speech at Christiant Liberty University, Romney referred to some of Wright’s more controversial sermons but in less demonstrative tones.  “Let’s face it,” Romney said.  “America has left some people behind.  America failed in providing liberty to all its citizens.  In some ways, we have a shameful past.  You know, sometimes I just want to shout, ‘Darn it, America!  Darn it, America!”  Republican strategest Michael Earl pointed out that there could be more to come.  “We should expect to hear some reflective statements from Romney about America’s place in the world and its responsbsiblities for the past,” said Earl.  “He needs to get to the middle to win the general election.”  Romney’s spouse, Ann Romney, did not respond to telephone calls or email requests for comment.  She is believed to be en route to suburban Detroit, Michigan where she will be delivering a speech to high school students.  Ms. Romney has expanded her role on her husbands campain in recent weeks.  [More]

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